I will never forget the feelings I felt during miles 18 and 19 in the Austin Marathon (my first marathon). I had no desire to quit but I cried. I cried because my legs hurt. I cried because my mind was bored. I cried because I knew that to get to the finish, I would have to endure more.
This afternoon my doc mentioned inducing me Friday (38 weeks) or next week. I wasn't tempted even for a second to say yes. But I cried. I've never gone past that day and all signs show that I will. Today has felt like the "middle miles" of this marathon. I have been bitchy, tired and anxious. Instead of enjoying the life inside of me, I've complained.
Jeremy came home and told me to go to Target or Hobby Lobby. I'm doing both. Something amazing happened when I got in my suburban. One of my favorite Hillsong United songs came one. I've listened to it a hundred times but it never spoke to me like it did today. "I have decided, I have resolve to WAIT UPON THE LORD." The power of the Holy Ghost was so heavy that all I could do was sob.
God is doing something so amazing in my life right now. I truly believe I'm in the first stage of labor right now. With each stage the Holy spirit is going to give me something. He gave me peace just a few minutes ago. Maybe that means the second stage is soon! :) Regardless, He showed me months ago that each phase of labor would bring revelation. So I'm through the "wall" and ready to hear Him again.
Naomi and I have been praying about the labor and delivery room. God is going to show up and there is going to be a thick anointing in that room when Jude enters into this world. Chains are going to be broken, lives are going to be healed, eyes will be opened, Christ will be revealed!! The finish line will be a brand new victory and a brand new life! No one in that room will EVER be the same again.
Please listen to this song!
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